Crazy Train Catering

2025-03-31

Can three people struggling with their mental health overcome their symptoms and work together to start a catering business? You bet they can!

Follow the hilarious kitchen and dining room escapades of Justine, Ted and Birget as they downplay their symptoms to serve burgers, a classy dinner and even cater a wedding!

Sometimes up, sometimes down, with wavering concentration but with always positive attitudes, these struggling entrepreneurs get the job done while their financial backer watches in awe.

Crazy Train Catering is an inspiration to people struggling with their mental health who aren't content to just sit around.

Crazy may be in the house but it's not on the menu tonight.

Bon appétit!

Price

Digital Edition

$14.99 CAD

Purchase includes two formats: an e-book and a mobile-friendly PDF.

The Crazy Train Catering mobile-friendly PDF format features colour, large font sizes and ample line spacing. It makes for an easy and pleasurable read. It also contains accessibility features.

Print Edition

$19.99 CAD + shipping

The print editions of Crazy Train Catering are handcrafted, individually made and individually bound. As paperbacks, they measure 5.83" in width by 8.27" in height (i.e., an A5 page size).

The print editions of Crazy Train Catering are artisan works which will be treasured for generations.

At this time, Print Editions of Boulder Lane books are only available to residents of Canada.

What is the Process for Purchase?

Digital Editions and Print Editions must be purchased separately.

Digital Edition

To purchase the Digital Edition of Crazy Train Catering:

1. Customers are to click either the Buy Now or Add to Cart buttons below. They will be taken to PayPal's web site where they may make payment. Payment may be made using either a PayPal account, Apple Pay, Google Pay, or a credit card;
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Print Edition

To purchase the Print Edition of Crazy Train Catering:

1. Customers are to indicate the number of copies desired in the PayPal order form following (scroll down);
2. Customers are to enter Yes in the box under the question, "Are you a resident of Canada?"
3. Customers are to click the Add to Cart button;
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6. Customers may either continue browsing the Boulder Lane web site or click the Cart button to be taken to PayPal;
7. Payment may be made using either a PayPal account, Apple Pay, Google Pay, or a credit card;
8. If the customer pays by credit card, PayPal will require the customer to enter their address and telephone number. This is to ensure the details the customer enters with PayPal match those of which the customer's credit card issuer has on file for that customer;
9. Customers are to indicate their complete shipping address in the appropriate boxes, unless their shipping address is the same as their billing address;
10. 5% Goods and Services Tax (GST) will be added to the total of their order. (At this time, there is no provincial or territorial sales tax on books or e-books anywhere in Canada);
11. Customers are to complete their payment;
12. Customers will be redirected back to this page following completion of their payment;
13. Boulder Lane will be notified by PayPal that the customer has made payment;
14. Boulder Lane will generate a receipt for the customer and e-mail a link to the customer to download it from Boulder Lane's Proton Drive account. The receipt will contain Boulder Lane's HST number; and
15. Boulder Lane will prepare and ship the customer's Print Edition order. Shipping will be through Canada Post using lettermail delivery.

Boulder Lane's Refund Policy

All sales final. No returns, no exchanges.

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Should you have any questions or concerns please contact info@boulderlane.me.

Thank you!

Excerpts

"I'm hearing voices," she said.

"You're hearing things?" the clerk shouted over the hum of the busy Ottawa emergency room.

"Yes," she replied.

"Are they telling you to do things, like violent things?" the clerk persisted.

"No."

"Have a seat," the clerk said. "We'll be with you as soon as we can."

She proceeded into the waiting room and sat down. Immediately, the people there rose from their seats and moved as far away from her as the room would allow.

In the morning, Justine and Will sat at the kitchen table drinking coffee. Justine had trouble with mornings. Her head was fuzzy, like she had just woken up in the middle of the night. Her thoughts were confused. Her head wouldn't clear and she couldn't think straight.

She needed her medication.

The door to the second bedroom burst open and an older man shot out. "Good morning," he said. "My name is Ted."

"Good morning," Will and Justine said in unison.

Ted was a sight to behold. He was five feet six inches tall with close-cropped white hair and a small pot belly. He was stocky with large arms and a barrel chest. He wore a tight white T-shirt with red sauce stains on the front of it. The sauce was also stuck to his thick white moustache. He was noticeably jolly and brightened up the room. Justine's head began to clear.

Ted's animation contrasted with Justine's preoccupation with her thoughts. Ted zeroed in on this and started asking questions. Justine opened up a bit but emphasized, "I need my medication; I should go home."

"Tell me what it is; I probably have it," Ted volunteered.

Shocked, Justine insisted that Ted probably didn't, that the medication was pretty obscure.

"Tell me what it is," Ted persisted.

"It's called brexpiprazole," Justine spat out.

Ted disappeared into his bedroom and returned with a box of brexpiprazole. "I'm bipolar," he said. "I get these by the carton now."

It was the beginning of a match made in heaven. Will took off in shock.

"My dearly beloved," proclaimed Ted, "that's why I've gathered you here today. I've heard through the grapevine that the downtown community centre is looking for someone to operate their kitchen."

"Whoa!" cried Justine.

"Whoa!" echoed Birget.

"We have to do something for money!" Ted persisted. "It's either that or quit drinking."

"No!"

"No!"

"It's perfect for us," insisted Ted.

"Most of the demand is on week-ends and for catering. I don't think they operate the kitchen during the week for lunches and dinners anymore. They weren't making money on it. Don't you think we can work one day a week?"

"I don't know if I can go back to serving tables," complained Birget.

"Well, Birget, why are you on disability?" asked Justine.

"Ordering please," called out Justine.

"Go ahead," replied Ted.

"Two burgers well-done," said Justine as she shivered in the cold in front of the barbecue.

It was a Friday in early March and they were catering a basic lunch at the community centre. The executive director of the centre had approached Ted and asked if he would be interested in taking over the catering operation. Ted had said, "Yes," and the director told him he could start with a hamburger lunch.

"Tell me why again we're freezing out here and not cooking these burgers in the kitchen," complained Justine.

"Because they taste better cooked this way," answered Ted. "You're just spoiled. Now get back inside."

Justine started chopping the onions, celery and green peppers with the German-made knife while Ted went for a beer in the lounge. He needed to socialize a bit before getting down to the wire. An hour later, Ted entered the kitchen, borrowed the knife and began cutting up the pork tenderloin into bite-size pieces. He then rolled them in the flour and egg batter and fried them in a large pan with vegetable oil. He returned the knife to Justine who continued chopping.

"I don't mind doing this," said Justine. "It's relaxing."

"Make sure that the celery is cut on an angle," instructed Ted. A moment later he added, "working with your hands is good for your head. You should do it more often."

Justine and Ted chose a high table with stools. Ted ordered a small pitcher of beer and Justine her usual glass of white.

"We could make a mint if we had this place," remarked Justine.

"We'd certainly keep it up better," said Ted.

The server returned with a large pitcher of beer, a mug, three shooters and a half-carafe of white wine. Justine and Ted exchanged glances. "Kendrick!" they exclaimed together.

Kendrick was a lawyer and an alcoholic but he would never admit to being a lawyer. If pressed, he would admit to being a bureaucrat because he worked for the federal government.

Ted spoke to Kendrick in private later. Kendrick lent him $1500 in case he was successful in his bid. They talked some more about the business idea in general.

"Are you sure all three of you can do this, being, you know, kind of crazy?" asked Kendrick.

"No, I'm not sure," replied Ted. "But I think we should try. You don't get anywhere in life unless you try and I'm not ready to give up yet."

The music sounded from the phone on the night table. Slowly, Justine woke up and then suddenly jumped up. Ted jumped up, too. It was June 21, the big day: the wedding. Each one rose from bed knowing their performance this day could make or break them in the catering business.

Excited, they had a bite to eat and showered. They found themselves with a bit of time so they sat down at the kitchen peninsula with cups of coffee.

"This is a different kind of work for you, Justine," said Ted. "How do you like it?"

"I like the number crunching," replied Justine. "I enjoy the costing and sorting out the grocery list. It reminds me of management. I also enjoy the shopping. But remembering the anniversary dinner, I don't think I can chop vegetables for an hour every day."

"It won't be every day," assured Ted.

"I'm glad Kendrick came through again with a loan for the up-front expenses," said Justine. "We wouldn't be able to do this without his help. Did you say he's working with us today?"

"Yes," answered Ted. "I asked him to help serve and garnish the plates."

"So that leaves Birget and I to play servers. At least it seems that she is out of her depression funk."